I have a feeling my maths tutor thinks i'm a little weird.

She called me schizo just now. Because i kept laughing. Although really, i kept laughing only because of her. And then i tried to regain my composure but then i thought about it again and laughed to myself and then tried to be calm again.

You see. You see these kind of things happen and its magically all my fault. When really, its because we had this conversation that went like this.

Imagine my Tutor sounding distressed, and that "i'm not scolding you but i just sound like i am because i am trying to teach a Michelle Wong" (or something like that).

Michelle sounding awkward. No seriously, i sound very awkward. With the pauses in between and the whole hand gestury thing. Do i know why? No. I think its because she made me nervous. Or maybe i'm just awkward. But lets not talk about that.

CONVERSATION

Tutor: So to plot your graph you must first find your Y intercept, then you find your maximum or minimum point, and then you find your X intercept if it is possible, and then you state your line of symmetry and write the equation of the curve or line. Do you understand?
Michelle: Right then.
Tutor: So what do you find first?
Michelle: You find the Y intercept and then you find your maximum slash minimum point and then your X value nonono i mean intercept, yes intercept, and then you put that, that thing.
Tutor: What thing?
Michelle: That, that, line *draws line in the air with finger* thing.
Tutor: What line thing?
Michelle: THE ANGLE OF SYMMETRY. Hey wait no! I mean the line *draws line in the air again*, line of symmetry. Yes. The line, of symmetry thing.
Tutor: *tsks* Better remember okay.
Michelle: Alrighty.
Tutor: What did you say?
Michelle: Alrighty.
Tutor: What is alrighty?
Michelle: You know, like, "alright" just with the "(tee)" at the back.
Tutor: Why would you say that?
Michelle: *shakes head and says in that a little over dramatic way* I have no idea.
Tutor: Haha you're so funny.
Michelle: Hehe.
Tutor: So then what do you do?
Michelle: For what?
Tutor: To plot you graph.
Michelle: Er first you have to find the Y intercept and then you find your maximum slash minimum point and then you put your line of symmetry *triumphant smile* and then you write your equation of the curve or line.
Tutor: What else?
Michelle: What else what?
Tutor: What else do you have to find?
Michelle: I thought i found everything.
Tutor: You left out something.
Michelle: What did i leave out?
Tutor: Do you think i'd tell you?
Michelle: But, then how do i know what i left out if i didn't know what i left out to say what i left out.
Tutor: Say it again lah.
Michelle: Say what?
Tutor: *exasperated* Whaaat do you need to fiiiiind to plottttt your graaaaaph.
Michelle: I need to find my Y intercept, my maximum slash minimum point-
Tutor: Who do you say slash? Why can't you just say maximum OR minimum point?
Michelle: Alrighty.
Tutor: And why do you say "Alrighty"? Why can't you just say "Alright"?
Michelle: Right then.

Don't you think its funny? I think its very funny!

I'll post pictures next time :).

Michelle went "Hey macadamia" :)

One day, a few/ many/ thousand years ago, my brother came up to me and said,

"(Mark) Mc (mark) guess what! We have Mongolian blood!"

And i believed him.

Till this day he reminds me of this. Like today for example! When he sent me an sms telling me that we were of Mongolian descent. To which i replied,

"That is why we cannot sing."

But knowing us, it is probably just an excuse.

Because i am the geog rep.

Michelle went "Hey macadamia" :)

The feeling of novelty that Michelle gets when she participates in the Novelty Race is such a novelty that she does it for 3 consecutive years just to feel the noveltiness of the Novelty Race competitor in with the Novelty Race competitor competes in a Novelty Race.

And also, its because shes not good for anything else. Bahaha :D.

So for today, i shall teach you the know-hows and kung-pows of the Novelty Race industry.

Being a Novelty Race participant for the past 3 years, i feel it is my duty to educate the younger generation. And teach them the true ways of being a Novelty Star.

Our tag line, The novelty doesn't come from participating in the race, it comes from the name "Novelty Race".

Now, the first thing a Novelty Race competitor must know is that the reason you're participating in it, is because well, you're not a runner or in cheerleading (read: less atheletic ability). but its alright! Because the teachers usually recognise this and make the race unconventional. Meaning like they have a three legged race and then make you balance a ball between you and your partner in the tango position (read: more interesting but less dramatic than running through the wind). But you know what? Thats the first thing we must learn. Which is to accept ourselves, and be proud of who we are. We are on our way XD!

Second thing. A Novelty Race competitor must never complain. First, it is respect towards the teachers, game, and ourselves. And also i mean it'll sound a little bad if you cry to your friend saying "OHMYGOSH. Just now i picked up the bean bag and balanced it on my head but then when i started to walk the bean bag fell and i was like OHMGOSHTHEBEANBAGFELL and then i picked it up and put it on my head again but then i walked and it fell and i was like WHY and i started trembling and then the bean bag kept vibrating and we lost and OHMGOSHI'MSOSORRY."

A bit weird right?

So the third thing we learn today kids, is that we must always laugh. Imagine the same senario, but approached with a proper Novelty Race competitors attitude.

"OHMYGOSH. Just now i picked up the bean bag and balanced it on my head but then when i started to walk the bean bag fell and i was like OHMGOSHTHEBEANBAGFELL and then i picked it up and put it on my head again but then i walked and it fell and i was like WHY and i started trembling and then the bean bag kept vibrating and we lost and OHMYGOSHITWASSOFUNNY! Ahahahahhahahahahaaa!"

Do you see the difference? Thats the key. Thats the Novelty key.

Now, the fourth thing we learn is that we must not be skeptical of the race. I know i know, hard to do. Novelty Race competitors are often given such interesting races to complete to test their mind. Yes. Yes indeed. It challenges you and asks you the quesiton "How?"

How am i going to start?
How am i going to continue?
How am i going to strategise to make sure i am the fastest?
How am i going to react to unforeseen problems?
How am i going to complete?

I'm not saying that the runners or cheerleaders don't do that too of course :), i'm just relating it to the Novelty Experience. Which is another thing, my dear friends. The Novelty Experience.

It is that feeling of going through a race, and rushing, and laughing, and cheering, and scolding people, and screaming, and squating down at the finish line. That is something that only Novelty Competitors can do. And my friends let me tell you, it is an honour.

Whats more, we can do it with style.

Not a lot of it, but still we can.

I was thinking about it today. Michelle, all these years you've missed out on the track race. Don't you want to do something different for a change? You would probably come in last (trust me), but why not just try? If you think of the track as your enemy, then by running on it, won't you be trampling it to its non-existant death?

And i say to myself now, after this moment of reflection.

That if there is a need to, i will whip out my handy dandy notebook!

From my pocket so it won't lag me down when i run.

But i think, as for now, i'm leaving my heart (and legs) where they belong.

In the noveltiness, of the Novelty Race.

Because thats what we are, a novelty.

:D.

&heartstotheworld!

Michelle went "Hey macadamia" :)

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